The Group Project
So this week I’ve seen so much conversation surrounding God. Everyone from TikTok gurus to global celebs and every social media theologian has been pondering the aspects and attributes of God’s existence. Without trying to find every single question that I saw, I’ll spare you and give you the gist of what had people in a tizzy. Folks seemed to be super bothered by the thought that if God is God, then why do they always have such human characteristics. Like, are we created in his image, or did we create God in ours? Or something like that. The existential shit show that became those comment sections, I literally could not. We got new images from the JWST of the vastness of space and muhfuckas decided to spiral. On Charlemagne the God’s post he referred to God using feminine pronouns and that had the Hoteps in utter shambles, chile, I had to get out of there.
So, before we continue I’m going to say this now… I am no philosopher or theologian; I just like to think about things and explore possibilities. My goal with this post isn't to challenge your faith or anything like that, it's just to make you think because: fun. So, if you find yourself offended by any of my opinions, you are welcomed to take up your triggers with a trusted mental health professional or find your mother or closest mother-figure and feel free to argue with her. So let's live our best Alice in Wonderland-ass lives and jump down the rabbit hole and see where this shit ends up, yes?
These convos typically start from the Christian viewpoint of God being loving but jealous, all knowing but somehow surprised by our fuck shit, tender-hearted but angry and petty. Basically giving, like, peak Gemini crackhead energy. I used to feel that God was this magical supreme being that sits above us all essentially treating us like clumsy toddlers trying to figure out their legs, always watching but giving us space to figure it out. That was still part of me shedding those last few layers of my childhood indoctrination, I guess; the girlies that get it, get it. Now, I feel less like I’m figuring out my legs, but more like being in a group project and everybody is contributing the way they should.
The concept of God, for me, is the absolute of every belief while also being none of them. God is everything and nothing all at once, all of our collective beliefs and none of them at the same time, everywhere and nowhere. Why? Because we are the creators of our own Universe, the group project if you will, so whatever you believe to be true in your realm of understanding is true for you, but it means absolutely nothing to someone who doesn’t feel the resonance with the same thing you align with. Everything is relative to the experience of the individual and they determine the manifestation of God.
When I was a little kid, maybe around like eleven or twelve, I found myself scrambling to figure out what I believed in because I just knew Christianity wasn't that girlie for me. I remember having this vision of this concept of heaven and hell that blew my lil pre-teen mind wide open. I envisioned the vastness of space with all these bubbles, and each bubble was filled with people and a landscape that they collectively created with their thoughts and ideas. There were so many bubbles, and you weren't a slave to any one bubble, whatever you chose to believe, you'd just find yourself in the corresponding bubble. I remember seeing that some bubbles were massive, and some were smaller than others and they all were comprised of all the things that would make their beliefs a reality; from angels and demons to the way god looked, everything.
I knew that God wasn't at all what I thought, but somehow… was. And if I’m being real I still believe the bubbles exist and feel that I got a glimpse of the astral realm. Now, I know what some of you are thinking and I feel like this is a good time to remind you all that this came about when I was a kid, and I had yet to discover the bountiful blessings of plant medicine.
Over the years, I've refined my thoughts on God and what I wanted God to be for me, with and without the presence of drugs. I've settled on God being a higher aspect of myself, a pure wave of infinite possibilities, connected to all things. I like the idea of finding God in every experience, shaping the world I live in. It’s nice knowing that every choice I make, each thought I think, every place I go I am encountering God just by being there. I think that's much more comforting to me than trying to figure out if a being that could fold me faster than Beyoncé sells out of merch had ego or not.
Having the ability to be every choice or none of the choices, removes the concern for me of Them having an ego or any other human traits for that matter. God exists in every particle of creation from my breath to my moments of rage and all points in between. Making anything I do a spiritual experience, if I so choose… and I damn sure be choosing.
It’s literally the best kind of group project, you’re the teacher and student all at once and your partners are all contributing as they should. God is amazing They literally make life better for me by just be able to ponder Their existence. It’s meditation, it’s church, it’s praise it’s everything for me; it’s true freedom for me.
Anywho, I could go on forever about this and I know y’all got ass to shake and money to make because it’s the weekend baby! However, I do want to know what your God bubbles look like so share it with me in the comments, this is a safe space.
Alright y’all stay safe out there, keep your fingernails clean and use hand sanitizer. Love y’all! 🙃
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Also, make sure you’re up to date on my novella ‘Situationships & Sippy Cups’. It is available on Kindle Vella in the Amazon store, check it out!!!